Yes, I did the impossible... I handed the reins over to my boy Jay. I asked him to guest blog and he certainly delivered. This needs no introduction whatsoever, so just read on people.
(I love it when you call me Jay…)
Unless you have been under a rock for the last week you have certainly heard about the Rihanna/Chris Brown situation that has transpired. And while 95% of the people who claim to know what happened do not have a clue, we have all taken an educated guess that Chris Brown laid his hands on Rihanna. This is not the first time that Chris Brown has had some problems with his aggression. At a party in Europe last year he had to be restrained after he got into a scuffle with a few club goers. Also, there were rumors that he became violent and aggressive with a model in South Africa when she refused to have sex with him. All that glitters is not gold with Rihanna either, whether it has been her alleged affair with Jay-Z, or her “diva” tendencies. She has had her fair share of run-ins as well.
Immediately when this story broke, we jumped to the most outlandish assumptions, such as, Rihanna flipped out on Chris Brown about some chick texting him, and he in turn got mad at her and just starting beating on her. Or, Chris Brown got the “herp,” from Rihanna and then commenced to beat her ass. I mean really people?!
Here’s why I’m mad:
I am mad because all of our preconditions of this domestic violence come from their celebrity status. We are really only concerned about Chris Brown’s physical/verbal abuse now because it is in the news. It is the hot new gossip. We are at our computers trying to find the next scoop on what really happened inside that car. We are anticipating every comment from Chris or Rihanna on what really happened, or an official statement. We are more concerned with canceled tour dates, Chris Brown’s real location and what Jay-Z will do in retaliation, than anything else. Let’s be real people, we are talking about Rihanna and Chris Brown, we are NOT talking about domestic violence.
What is real is that while we have been caught up in this domestic violence scandal, the real face of domestic violence continues to be out there and stays completely hidden from the public eye. The average victims of domestic violence are not platinum selling recording artists, models, or actors. Nope; they live right at the end of your block. In the last week what could have happened should have been a new dedication to ending domestic violence or at least attempting to help those out there who are suffering, but instead we have been glued to our TV sets and every blog site we can find to get new details about Chris Brown and Rihanna.
So yeah, how about people spend some time being real stewards of change instead of into the latest celebrity gossip. How about we do not perpetuate guilty until proven innocent. (I swear to beans, do not let the report come out that Chris Brown was trying to defend himself from her and was merely shaking the “ish” out Rih-Rih, which Chris Rock said was clearly “fair game.”) How about we go online and find out some ways that we can really help fight domestic violence. How about we stop saying, “Yes we can,” or “Yes we did,” and start saying, “Yes we are.”
Could not have said it better myself Jay.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
Bicyclists
I just realized that I am most angry in the morning on my way to work. I encounter the most crazy individuals either walking or driving behind the wheel. In a previous blog post, I discussed my experiences with road rage. I forgot to mention my experiences with another offender.
Here's why I'm mad:
ARRGGHH!!! Bicyclists! They are all over the place. Some of them ride in to work, while others ride for work (courier services, delivery men/women, etc). I cannot STAND them. Bicyclists cannot ride on the sidewalk so they ride in the street... alongside me. They do not have indicators so they have to use their hands to let you know what direction they are going in. Here you are, weaving in and out of traffic, trying to cut me off so you can make a left turn. I guess I would be in the wrong if you got clipped "accidentally" by my car, huh?
What annoys me the most about them is the way they cross the street. They rarely, if ever, cross the street like normal people. OK, try to catch the visual: You are at an intersection and you need to cross vertically, but you also need to cross to your right, horizontally. 90 degrees, right? Nope, not bicyclists. They cross the street diagonally!! Then put their hands out in the street for you to stop, so they can illegally, and foolishly, cross the street even though you have the green light.
Bicyclists make me sick.
Besides their blatant disregard for my insurance rates, which will go up if I hit one of those suckers, and their health, which will be in jeopardy if I hit one of those suckers, their outfit annoys me! The standard bicyclist's outfit consists of these funky tight jackets and pants that are usually extremely bright.
I understand the functionality of having tight clothes. You need to ensure that your clothes do not snag on the peddles or bike chain and create a very dangerous accident. I even get the fact that you need to wear bright colors so that you can be seen by both drivers and pedestrians. However, just because I get it does NOT mean I condone it. You look absolutely ridiculous! Men look bad, but old men look worse! Even the men who wear work suits look ridiculous because they have their socks over their pant leg. I understand the safety risks but geez.
Ugh, bicyclists make me really sick.
There has to be a better way! There must! Some places have lanes just for bicyclists. I am sure that would not be easy in downtown Washington, D.C., but we need to explore that option. Please Mayor Fenty. Look into it. I beg you. My insurance rates and possible jail time depends on it!
Here's why I'm mad:
ARRGGHH!!! Bicyclists! They are all over the place. Some of them ride in to work, while others ride for work (courier services, delivery men/women, etc). I cannot STAND them. Bicyclists cannot ride on the sidewalk so they ride in the street... alongside me. They do not have indicators so they have to use their hands to let you know what direction they are going in. Here you are, weaving in and out of traffic, trying to cut me off so you can make a left turn. I guess I would be in the wrong if you got clipped "accidentally" by my car, huh?
What annoys me the most about them is the way they cross the street. They rarely, if ever, cross the street like normal people. OK, try to catch the visual: You are at an intersection and you need to cross vertically, but you also need to cross to your right, horizontally. 90 degrees, right? Nope, not bicyclists. They cross the street diagonally!! Then put their hands out in the street for you to stop, so they can illegally, and foolishly, cross the street even though you have the green light.
Bicyclists make me sick.
Besides their blatant disregard for my insurance rates, which will go up if I hit one of those suckers, and their health, which will be in jeopardy if I hit one of those suckers, their outfit annoys me! The standard bicyclist's outfit consists of these funky tight jackets and pants that are usually extremely bright.
I understand the functionality of having tight clothes. You need to ensure that your clothes do not snag on the peddles or bike chain and create a very dangerous accident. I even get the fact that you need to wear bright colors so that you can be seen by both drivers and pedestrians. However, just because I get it does NOT mean I condone it. You look absolutely ridiculous! Men look bad, but old men look worse! Even the men who wear work suits look ridiculous because they have their socks over their pant leg. I understand the safety risks but geez.Ugh, bicyclists make me really sick.
There has to be a better way! There must! Some places have lanes just for bicyclists. I am sure that would not be easy in downtown Washington, D.C., but we need to explore that option. Please Mayor Fenty. Look into it. I beg you. My insurance rates and possible jail time depends on it!
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Blame it on... Jamie?
For those of you who do not have Jamie Foxx's new album, get up on it. It is good. No, I mean really good! Intuition is a great follow-up to Foxx's first album, Unpredictable. Intuition starts out fast and once you get to song number 6, it mellows out, so it has a little bit for everyone. The album has great balance and should be copped immediately. Although this "Tell 'Em" section is not dedicated to Jamie's album, I felt the need to share that tid bit of information for those of you who were not in the know.
The second single off of Foxx's new album is "Blame It". The song refers to women engaging in certain behavior because of their inebriated state. I love this song. I do not like the lyrics.
Here's why I'm mad:
If you are ever in a situation where you need to blame it on the alcohol, then you are a certified loser. No, really. You are. Alcohol should never be the catalyst that causes you to say whatever or act however you want.
At the moment, I am trying to figure out which one is worst, a drunk man or a drunk girl. I know one thing- I cannot stand either one.
A drunk woman becomes an easy woman. For some reason, when under the influence, women become extremely loud, extremely sexual, extremely belligerent and extremely annoying. Men see this kind of woman and are either 1) completely turned off or 2) completely turned on. In each case, men see a loose woman which they find utterly despicable or easier to take advantage of. Whichever applies, a woman should not want to be either one. My freshman year of college, I watched a drunk girl BEG for sex and the man would not oblige because... yup, you guessed it... he was 1) completely turned off.
A drunk man becomes disrespectful. Men think they can fight any and everyone and can also talk slick out the mouth because of that last shot of Patron. I have had a drunk man accost me in the club because he has had too many drinks. I have had a drunk man grab my butt because he had too many drinks. Another man told my girlfriend, "I want to f*ck," because he had too many drinks. Really?! When is such language and behavior acceptable?!
Many of these situations occurred when I was in college. Although it is not okay, I can excuse that because in college, people are young and dumb. However, when you are a grown man/woman, you need to know when you have had enough, when to stop, and when to shut up.
Besides, watching you throw up in or outside the club is quite disgusting, no matter who you are. Now, not only have you managed to act like a complete buffoon, but you also look like one too.
The second single off of Foxx's new album is "Blame It". The song refers to women engaging in certain behavior because of their inebriated state. I love this song. I do not like the lyrics.
Here's why I'm mad:
If you are ever in a situation where you need to blame it on the alcohol, then you are a certified loser. No, really. You are. Alcohol should never be the catalyst that causes you to say whatever or act however you want.
At the moment, I am trying to figure out which one is worst, a drunk man or a drunk girl. I know one thing- I cannot stand either one.
A drunk woman becomes an easy woman. For some reason, when under the influence, women become extremely loud, extremely sexual, extremely belligerent and extremely annoying. Men see this kind of woman and are either 1) completely turned off or 2) completely turned on. In each case, men see a loose woman which they find utterly despicable or easier to take advantage of. Whichever applies, a woman should not want to be either one. My freshman year of college, I watched a drunk girl BEG for sex and the man would not oblige because... yup, you guessed it... he was 1) completely turned off.
A drunk man becomes disrespectful. Men think they can fight any and everyone and can also talk slick out the mouth because of that last shot of Patron. I have had a drunk man accost me in the club because he has had too many drinks. I have had a drunk man grab my butt because he had too many drinks. Another man told my girlfriend, "I want to f*ck," because he had too many drinks. Really?! When is such language and behavior acceptable?!
Many of these situations occurred when I was in college. Although it is not okay, I can excuse that because in college, people are young and dumb. However, when you are a grown man/woman, you need to know when you have had enough, when to stop, and when to shut up.
Besides, watching you throw up in or outside the club is quite disgusting, no matter who you are. Now, not only have you managed to act like a complete buffoon, but you also look like one too.
Let Me Get This Jay
In dedication of We Love Jackson...
I do not have a ton of female friends. Frankly, I do not really like them. I have a few that are tried and true: my Queens, my Sorors, my college buddies, and post-college friends. For each of the categories listed, I can count, on no more than two hands, the women that belong in each one. They all represent a certain part of my life and have been able to hold me down in some way, shape or form.
We Love Jackson (WLJ) has written a few articles about the kind of women that are visible in each clique. When I read his articles, I always wonder if any of my friends belong in those categories. Previous articles include The Thirsty Chick, The Hungry Chick, The Dumb Chick and most recently, The Negative Chick. According to WLJ, this negative chick is the downer in any crew and is just plain old unnecessary.
As with all of WLJ's articles, I quickly went into my Rolodex of friends and tried to decipher whether any of these women fit the bill. Thank goodness they do not. I noticed however, that a lot of women that commented on the article felt the need to defend said "negative chick".
Here's why I'm mad:
NO ONE NEEDS A NEGATIVE CHICK IN THEIR CREW. POINT BLANK. PERIOD.
I should end the post right there, but some of you may need further clarification, so here it is.
A few women discussed their need to have the negative chick around because she is not really negative, she is just being a "friend", a rational one at that. Some of these women also felt the "negative chick" was necessary because she would save them from a potentially harmful situation. Spare me. We are grown adults. Yes, your girl might be hip to something that you missed, but that does not mean she has to be the universal downer. Just because she is your friend does not give her the right to be rude or negative in anyway.
And just in case you were not sure what a "negative chick" is, here is an excerpt courtesy of WLJ:
"They always got something negative to say, they open up with something negative to say, they got a stank negative look on [their] face, they got a negative stank walk like they looking for something negative to happen. She probably ends all her sentences with an unnecessary, “sh*t.” For example, “I can’t stand these guys…. sh*t". They feel the need to always say something negative to bring you down; they never open with anything positive. Do not be fooled by communication such as, “Oh, it looks like you’re losing weight!” That just means she thinks you were fat.”
A lot of women feel this negative chick's sole purpose is to look out for you just in case you are too drunk to look out for yourself. Once you hit the age of 21, you should be able to contain your liquor. I do not drink for two reasons: 1) I need to be sober in order to drive myself home and 2) I need to keep my wits about me. I need to be able to assess a situation quickly just in case something goes down. I cannot do that if I am drunk. If you need your girlfriend there, aka negative chick, to babysit you should you consume one, too many drinks, then you should not be drinking in the first place. As a matter of fact, you should be banned from making public appearances until you get your act together.
There is no need for a negative person in life what so ever! If this is you, you need to check yourself. If this is your girl, you need to check her. As a matter of fact, you should probably ditch her all together. No one needs to hang around the harbinger of death. Why should you?
I do not have a ton of female friends. Frankly, I do not really like them. I have a few that are tried and true: my Queens, my Sorors, my college buddies, and post-college friends. For each of the categories listed, I can count, on no more than two hands, the women that belong in each one. They all represent a certain part of my life and have been able to hold me down in some way, shape or form.
We Love Jackson (WLJ) has written a few articles about the kind of women that are visible in each clique. When I read his articles, I always wonder if any of my friends belong in those categories. Previous articles include The Thirsty Chick, The Hungry Chick, The Dumb Chick and most recently, The Negative Chick. According to WLJ, this negative chick is the downer in any crew and is just plain old unnecessary.
As with all of WLJ's articles, I quickly went into my Rolodex of friends and tried to decipher whether any of these women fit the bill. Thank goodness they do not. I noticed however, that a lot of women that commented on the article felt the need to defend said "negative chick".
Here's why I'm mad:
NO ONE NEEDS A NEGATIVE CHICK IN THEIR CREW. POINT BLANK. PERIOD.
I should end the post right there, but some of you may need further clarification, so here it is.
A few women discussed their need to have the negative chick around because she is not really negative, she is just being a "friend", a rational one at that. Some of these women also felt the "negative chick" was necessary because she would save them from a potentially harmful situation. Spare me. We are grown adults. Yes, your girl might be hip to something that you missed, but that does not mean she has to be the universal downer. Just because she is your friend does not give her the right to be rude or negative in anyway.
And just in case you were not sure what a "negative chick" is, here is an excerpt courtesy of WLJ:
"They always got something negative to say, they open up with something negative to say, they got a stank negative look on [their] face, they got a negative stank walk like they looking for something negative to happen. She probably ends all her sentences with an unnecessary, “sh*t.” For example, “I can’t stand these guys…. sh*t". They feel the need to always say something negative to bring you down; they never open with anything positive. Do not be fooled by communication such as, “Oh, it looks like you’re losing weight!” That just means she thinks you were fat.”
A lot of women feel this negative chick's sole purpose is to look out for you just in case you are too drunk to look out for yourself. Once you hit the age of 21, you should be able to contain your liquor. I do not drink for two reasons: 1) I need to be sober in order to drive myself home and 2) I need to keep my wits about me. I need to be able to assess a situation quickly just in case something goes down. I cannot do that if I am drunk. If you need your girlfriend there, aka negative chick, to babysit you should you consume one, too many drinks, then you should not be drinking in the first place. As a matter of fact, you should be banned from making public appearances until you get your act together.
There is no need for a negative person in life what so ever! If this is you, you need to check yourself. If this is your girl, you need to check her. As a matter of fact, you should probably ditch her all together. No one needs to hang around the harbinger of death. Why should you?
Breaking up is hard to do...
The displeased diva is back and with a vengeance! Can you believe that I have been... dare I say... happy?! Besides a few ups and downs, for the most part, I have been quite content, but good things certainly do not last forever. It was just a matter of time before I became quickly displeased about a given situation, so let me just jump right in.
Here's why I'm mad:
Today is February 12. It is two days before Valentine's Day and a lot of commotion has been going around about this day of love. Single women are lamenting about their singledom and couples are feeling the pressure to show up and show out on this particular day. Even my parents are going out!*
A few women who are single and out of love, will be harboring their lack-of-love issues on their other single girlfriends and will probably be living it up this weekend on an "I'm Every Woman" tour. Just in case the tour is sold out in a city near you, I am sure these women will be at home/the club/bar drinking their single sorrows away.
B, please.
You were single February 13. You will be single February 15. Chances are, you will probably be single every day after that too. February 14th is no different. Why then do you run yourself ragged on this particular day?
If you are in a relationship, by no means are you exempt from this post either. Many of you put a lot of pressure on your significant other to woo you on this day and for what? If your man loves you and you love him, then why do you need a holiday (besides your anniversary) to publicly show your love for each other?
Many of you might be thinking I am saying these things because I am single. For those who feel that way, I was never the mushy, emotional, lovey-dovey type. Ask anyone. As a matter of fact, ask my ex-ex-boyfriend. We did NOTHING for Valentine's Day. There was no reason to. We both knew how we felt. We did not need a day to give us permission to do something nice for each other. The best thing he did for me, well one of the best things, was take me to an Anita Baker concert... in December. Why did he do that? Just because.
Women, enjoy who you are 365 days of the year. You do not need a man to tell you you are loved. You do not need flowers and chocolate and jewelry to signify your worth. Love God, love yourself and love others (in that order) and everything will fall into place.
Peace
*In their defense however, my father is prone to giving my mother flowers just because it is Saturday and he felt like it, so he gets a "get out of Valentine's Day Free card", which can be cashed it on any V-day he deems necessary.
Here's why I'm mad:
Today is February 12. It is two days before Valentine's Day and a lot of commotion has been going around about this day of love. Single women are lamenting about their singledom and couples are feeling the pressure to show up and show out on this particular day. Even my parents are going out!*
A few women who are single and out of love, will be harboring their lack-of-love issues on their other single girlfriends and will probably be living it up this weekend on an "I'm Every Woman" tour. Just in case the tour is sold out in a city near you, I am sure these women will be at home/the club/bar drinking their single sorrows away.
B, please.
You were single February 13. You will be single February 15. Chances are, you will probably be single every day after that too. February 14th is no different. Why then do you run yourself ragged on this particular day?
If you are in a relationship, by no means are you exempt from this post either. Many of you put a lot of pressure on your significant other to woo you on this day and for what? If your man loves you and you love him, then why do you need a holiday (besides your anniversary) to publicly show your love for each other?
Many of you might be thinking I am saying these things because I am single. For those who feel that way, I was never the mushy, emotional, lovey-dovey type. Ask anyone. As a matter of fact, ask my ex-ex-boyfriend. We did NOTHING for Valentine's Day. There was no reason to. We both knew how we felt. We did not need a day to give us permission to do something nice for each other. The best thing he did for me, well one of the best things, was take me to an Anita Baker concert... in December. Why did he do that? Just because.
Women, enjoy who you are 365 days of the year. You do not need a man to tell you you are loved. You do not need flowers and chocolate and jewelry to signify your worth. Love God, love yourself and love others (in that order) and everything will fall into place.
Peace
*In their defense however, my father is prone to giving my mother flowers just because it is Saturday and he felt like it, so he gets a "get out of Valentine's Day Free card", which can be cashed it on any V-day he deems necessary.
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